Reflecting on the
last things I’ve posted, I don’t disagree with any of it. In fact the Lions and
Sheep post is something I have to remind myself of all the time. (Spoiler
alert: Ignorant people do not evaporate once you go to college.) I did notice
in a previous post that I said the grass may not always be greener on the other
side. As it turns out, when it comes to a university vs a community college,
the grass is significantly greener. So I was wrong there. But the thing is, I
have all of these amazing things going for me, but there’s still this tiny
voice in the back of my head trying to mess everything up.
I’m writing
this (as a now 20 year old) to say that your mother is always right. Okay, well
most of the time, your mother is right. But MY mother, is always right. At the
age of now 20.. (have I mentioned that I’m 20 yet?) I still call my mom every
day. Two days ago I called her bawling my eyes out because I was upset about
something entirely too insignificant for me to be upset about. But I’m a female
so I can partly blame it on that. I’m also partly blaming it on the fact that
it’s finals week and sanity is in short supply. But I called her for advice and
basically said, “This is eating me alive. Please tell me that it’s going to be
okay and please empathize with me.” My mother is a very kind, loving woman.
Unfortunately I’m as stubborn as they come so when it comes to giving me
advice, she has to hurt my feelings a little bit to get me to really listen.
The basic summary went something like this, “Katie, you are freaking out over
nothing. You are responsible for your own actions and no one else’s. You have
everything going for you so what does that mean? Satan wants to steal your
joy. And you are letting him do it.” I
instantly realized a few things. The first thing I realized was that I called
the wrong person for sympathy. I called the wrong person to tell me what I
wanted to hear. But she’s supposed to tell me hard things. She is supposed to
give me grown up answers to grown up situations that I deal with. The next
thing I realized, was that she was 100% right.
Satan is the ruler of the earth. The book of John talks about how he
comes to steal, kill and destroy. Which is yet another reason it’s important to
put on your armor and pick up your cross every single day. And if he can’ t
make you sin; he’ll just make you busy. He’ll make you too busy to spend time
with the Prince of Peace and he will cause strife and worry in your life. And
guess what college makes you: really, really busy. The other part of that verse is that he comes
like a thief in the night. If he showed up and had a red flashing sign that
said, “I have come to steal your joy, please comply.” It would be really easy
to spot. Unfortunately, we never see it coming. The way that I was letting him
steal my joy was letting crap creep up on all my social media that upset me. I
was letting myself get way too upset about stuff that does not matter. I sat in
my car and cried for another hour. Not because I was still sad or upset. But
because I had gotten so distracted and busy that I had forgotten what it was
like to just sit and listen to God and talk to Him. I had been so caught up in
my life and what I was doing and what other people were doing that I had
forgotten that the only way I will ever find true peace and true comfort is in
Him. Sometimes it takes my mom’s tough love to show me things like that.
It’s been a
total 48 hours since that happened and I deleted those social media apps off of
my phone. (Not permanently.) But I didn’t do it because social media is evil. I
didn’t do it because my mom told me it was a good idea. I did it because I
spent entirely too much time on it. Satan saw it as a foothold as a way to suck
me into depression, and he took it. The cool thing about fasting from things
you really need to fast from: is that it’s not easy to do. I pick up my phone
about 15 times a day with the intentions of checking Instagram and Twitter.
I’ve actually come really close to downloading it again just to check up on
everything (And by the way it’s only been 48 hours if that’s any indication as
to how often I was on it.) The only reason I don’t is because I literally had
to lay what was bothering me at the foot of the cross and say. “Please take it.
I can’t deal with this on my own and I need your help.” I know what you’re thinking. “Isn’t that a
bit much for two social media apps?” Nah. The cool thing about Jesus is that He
cares. To you, it may not seem like much. To me, it was a distraction and every
time I got on, I would make myself sick over something as small as a “like.” He doesn’t think it’s silly. So here I am, at
the end of the first semester of my first year away from home, reminding myself
that nothing is too small for Him to care about. I had lost track of who I am
and where my identity lies. The fact of the matter is that my identity doesn’t
lie in what tweets get “favorited” or who “likes” my pictures or who doesn’t.
My identity lies in Christ and what He did for me. Am I perfect? No. Will I
ever be? No. Will I lose track of this again? More than likely. The other cool
thing about Jesus is that his love is relentless and so is His grace.
With all of
that terribly drawn out story: I’ll close with this.
*Nothing is too small for Him to care about. I promise He
wants to help you.
* Social media is not as big of a deal as everyone makes it
out to be. And if it’s possible for you to take a break from it, I suggest
doing so. It’s cool to see the world without a phone in front of your face.
* Will it matter 10 years from now? Will it matter in the
eternal perspective?
* BE ON YOUR GUARD. Any way that Satan can steal your joy,
he will. Don’t let it happen.
* Anything that you can’t do on your own, there’s a reason
you can’t. Lay it at the cross.
* Universities are better that high school AND community
colleges. If you’re struggling, hang in there. I promise it’s better.
*Oh and your mom? She’s always right.
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